Are You Afraid to Connect with People?

Let me ask you this. Are you afraid to connect with people? Does the mere idea of in person networking and interacting with people make you cringe? 

Well, you are not alone. Yet, what we want to share here with you is that there is no need to be afraid. Connecting with people can be one of the most rewarding and fulfilling experiences you have. 

The Power of Networking

The main reason you want to connect with people and ultimately have quality relationships is that we are a social species. We thrive in a community (yes, even if we’d rather be in the corner). 

No one is ever self-made. Success takes a village, and you need your village of friends, family, coworkers, fans, mentors and mentees, coaches 😉, influencers, etc. 

“If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go further, go together.”

The most successful people in the world and in history had teams of people who created their success. You need one too. 

And if you aspire to reach the C-suite level, you definitely need a strong network of people who can lift you to the highest pinnacle. This means you need to be comfortable with in person networking.

Don’t Like In Person Networking?

If you are afraid to connect with people, welcome to the club. We know what it’s like. But we can also assure you that you can overcome this fear. 

How? 

Good question, my fellow high-achiever. By knowing where this fear comes from. 

Seeing the world through Level 1

As you already know, there are 7 levels of energy we experience. Level 1 is the energy of fear and doubt. This is the mindset that makes you stay in the corner of the room and hope no one comes to speak with you at an event. 

And it all comes from…(drum rolls please)…your thoughts!

Think about it (punt intended)! What do you usually think about in these situations? 

Whether you admit it or not, your thoughts are centered around you. In one form or another, you are thinking about yourself. 

• Will they like me?
• Am I interesting enough? 
• I know I’m boring
• I’m just not good enough at this
• I’ve never been good at meeting people
• I’m shy
• I’m introverted

Ok, let me stop here. I can go on for a while with the stories a level 1 mindset generates. No need to throw in the kitchen sink. 

What now, then? How do you get out of the fear perspective?

Moving up the energy levels

Yes, you guessed it. You stop being afraid to connect with people by moving up your energy levels. 

Ideally, you want to change your perspective to at least level 4 – the energy of care and (conditional) love. 

I care about people and more

Let’s try this. Think of a person you want to connect with. It can be anyone – from an old friend you haven’t messaged in years to someone you have never met but might have a chance to meet at an in person networking event next week. Do you have the person in mind?

Now, write down all the “not good enough” and “I’m afraid to connect with people” thoughts that popped up in your head. 

What happens if we replace these thoughts with one or more of the following:

• She is another human being just like me who longs to be understood (level 4)
• He needs my connection and help as much as I need his (level 4)
• Connecting with her is an excellent opportunity to have fun and remember our childhood (level 5)
• I’m curious to find out in what ways we can both benefit If I reach out to him (level 5)
• We all have a gift and are a gift – I will share my gift by meeting this person, and she will share her gift with me (level 6)
• There is power in partnerships – together, we can create miracles; thus, I will talk with him and get to know him (level 6)
• I create my world as I choose to – let’s talk and get to know these people. We are all one after all (level 7)

Play the levels game and see how easy it is to reach out and connect with people once you see the world through the lenses of compassion, peace, joy, or absolute passion. When you are filled with these emotions, there’s no room for fear. 

Give it a try now. Write down all the caring thoughts you can think of about the person you want to connect with. And if you need more inspiration and tips, this Forbes article is a great resource to check.

Are you still unwilling to participate in in person networking?

No worries. It takes time and practice to reframe assumptions and limiting beliefs you grew up with. If it took you 30 years to be this person, it would take more than 30 seconds to change your thoughts. 

Keep at it and play the levels game every time you are about to meet someone new or connect with a person you haven’t talked with in a while. 

See the situation through the lenses of levels 4, 5, 6, and even 7. This will change your life and the lives of the people you connect with. You will become a master at in person networking.

In the meantime, if you are curious to see how much of level 1 you are currently experiencing, the ELI Assessment is for you. Book yours here, and we’ll be happy to open a world of possibilities and new connections for you.